This isn’t entirely a joke. Some Managing Partners may think their appointment was divinely inspired but almost all report that their partners neither show an appropriate level of respect nor comply with many of their requests.

Well Managing Partners, you may not be alone. According to his religion, the election of the late Pope was divinely inspired. Notwithstanding that, according to a BBC account, Archbishop Stanislaw Dziwisz, the personal secretary of the late Pope John Paul II, says he has not burned the former pontiff’s personal papers as the Pope had requested.

In the church to which Archbishop Stanislaw Dziwisz belongs, the Pope was the closest living mortal to a diety, (even fast tracked to Sainthood by the newly elected Pope). Yet, Archbishop Stanislaw Dziwisz is reported to have failed to accede to his late employer’s request. Does he think like partners in law firms that he can simply ignore his leader? On what basis? I guess the same basis that partners in most law firms feel that there is no rule or law that the partnership or Managing Partner can make that would apply to them… that their discretion is the true diety.

Not only does he want to preserve what he was asked to destroy, he wants to broadcast the contents on Polish radio. Is nothing sacred (pun very much intended)?

Food for Thought: This is rather ironic, don’t you think? Andersen went down for destroying papers only to be vindicated by the US Supreme Court – and it looks like Archbishop Stanislaw Dziwisz can unilaterally disobey the Pope and NOT destroy papers – with no apparent consequences – well, at least none that have been reported so far. (Perhaps the real consequences will occur at the pearly gates… for the Andersen crew, the Archbishop – and maybe even for your partners.)

So, Managing Partners, even if your election had been inspired by your Creator, most of your partners wouldn’t listen to you anyway. Feel better?

I am often asked if I can train practice group leaders or industry group leaders or department chairs to properly manage their respective charges. Often, these people are entirely unmanaged because the Managing Partner thinks that their supervision consists entirely of appointing them.

So, my questions for Managing Partners include:

Are you managing your managers?

Are you a leadership role model for the leaders you appointed?

Do you monitor performance and give helpful feedback, one leader at a time?

Do you bring your leaders together to share collective experiences and learn from each other?

Expect no more from those you have appointed than they see exhibited in your own performance.

Finally, if you want leadership training for those who report to you, attend every session with them… not just to learn along side them but to give guidance as they encounter the inevitable plethora of leadership decisions.

Andersen was the best of the best – training, growth, strategy – they were the role model – and then the scapegoat hunt happened in that great country with the best constitution in the world… that country that threw tea in the harbor… the country where people are innocent until proven guilty… that country stepped on them as if they were ants… tinier ants than they really were… and now, like the rapists DNA – they are exonerated – SHAME ON THE ZEALOTS WHO CRUSHED THEM

From the Art of War Blog:

Strategy teaches that we can never see our own position. We need outsiders to give us perspective.

You may want to look at the full article, however, the point is this: law firms rarely have an outside board member or a client mentor – instead we tend to fear the input of non-lawyers. Why? Is it because they really don’t understand or we fear they may see us with clarity?

I do not think we fear clarity – I think we fear having to convince our partners that our myopic preconceived notions are sometimes plain wrong.

In the newest issue of Fast Company, an article entitled The Interpreter starts out like this:

Claudia Kotchka is holding the secret to understanding design at Procter & Gamble in her palm. It’s not a P&G product but a tin of Altoids, the “curiously strong” mints produced by Wrigley. As the scent of peppermint oil wafts out of the box, she points out the nostalgic typeface, the satisfyingly crinkly liner paper. “Even the little mints look handmade,” she says. “It’s not completely full. The whole thing is very authentic.”

Then comes the twist. “Let’s say P&G buys this brand. What are we going to do?” asks Kotchka, P&G’s vice president for design innovation and strategy. “[Employees] always gave me the same answers. ‘We’re gonna cost-save on this tin. We’re gonna get rid of this stupid paper — it’s serving no functional purpose.'” She plops the tin on the table and picks up another product, unable to suppress a mischievous smile. “And I go, ‘Okay! Exactly! And this is what you get.’ ”

Kotchka reveals “Proctoids,” a box made of cheap white plastic from P&G’s baby-wipe containers. With uniform beige ovals jammed into the container, fewer colors on the lid, and no paper, Proctoids taste like Altoids, but they look as appealing as a pile of horse pills. Gone is the pleasure people get when they buy Altoids. Gone, too, is the up to 400% premium they pay. “That’s what design is,” she says of the look and feel. “That’s what designers do.”

Food for Thought: What Claudia says Proctor & Gamble would do to Altoids is exactly what most law firms do… Good lawyers believe that quality work should speak for itself and therefore be in high demand. But in the real world, people are attracted to the “crinkly liner paper”… the “experience”… In our highly fragmented profession, it’s time for some law firms to stand out from the pack by creating an attractive experience that goes along with the high quality work. You’ve heard of practice management – but do we disciuss “Practice Design”? No, most will laugh off the idea – too new… too unusual… but a few will think about it and do something that creates competitive advantage. So, in your firm, who will you appoint as the Practice Design Manager?

OK – now it’s getting funny (whew). See post below that horrified even me (about P.E.I., a Canadian province, reducing its suicide line from 24 hours to 9AM to 5PM – RIDICULOUS). In reversing the cut, P.E.I. Health Minister Chester Gillan said his department was responding to concerns expressed by Islanders. He also said the province would consider expanding the service to help people with gambling problems. (I am not making this up – please have a glance.) Good grief… we go from abandoning suicidal people for the 16 hours every day when they are most likley to need help to tossing gamblers into the 24 hour system. I think I will stop reading Canadian news for a couple of days. I can’t take the excitement. (Thank goodness the earlier decision was reversed – Oh Canada)

An extremely embarrassing moment for every Canadian:

TORONTO (Reuters) – A Canadian province will shut its 24-hour suicide hotline and replace it with one that operates only during business hours. Prince Edward Island, a small province on Canada’s East Coast, says it is too expensive to operate the hotline around the clock. Starting June 1, it will be open only between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m., Monday through Friday.

I post this with trepidation – take a look.

If this were not shocking – it would be funny… but it is not funny at all.